Today’s youth have grown up with the World Wide Web, and are the first generation of digital natives. They have a more accepting and open-minded relationship with the information technology that is rapidly reshaping the world, while the rest of us are usually playing catch-up trying to work out what is really going on. At its best, the Internet is a fantastic resource for learning, entertainment and communication. But it can also be addictive, anti-social and downright dangerous. The bottom line is we really need to know what they are doing online.

Establishing ground rules

A constructive security approach is based on talking openly with children about the positive and negative aspects of the Internet and how to use it safely. We need to make it normal and easy for children to discuss their favorite websites and whatever else they encounter on the web, including unpleasant or disturbing content.

With younger kids, the aim is to shield them from exposure to harmful content and to set rules that keep their online enthusiasm within reasonable bounds. Parents can take the initiative by introducing kids to fun but safe websites. Recommendations from other parents or teachers are a good starting point.

Locating the computer in a place where you can keep an eye on your child’s Internet activity gives you more control. It’s also important to set clear limits on the amount of time children spend online and what websites they can visit. The parental control feature on software like CenturyLink™ Online Security is an easy way to enforce your Internet policies and enables you to set specific time limits. Without basic ground rules, kids can become addicted to the screen and neglect other activities that involve physical play, normal socializing and being outdoors.

Online behavior code

Most kids enjoy taking on the teacher role, so if your web-savviness is already light years behind your children, ask them to show you where they are going and what they are doing online. Surfing the net can also be a joint family activity.

As kids start receiving spam email and joining chat rooms, they inevitably run into the nasty side of the Internet. It’s our job to prepare them for this by instilling a code of conduct for online behavior. The rules are simple: children should never reveal their real names, phone numbers, email, home or school addresses on the Internet, or post photos to people they don’t know.

Kids often have good instincts when dealing with strangers outside the home, but online chat rooms are more complex and real identities can be easily hidden. The harsh reality is that behind any online ‘friend’ in a chat room there could be a predator attempting to ‘befriend’ your child. Children should never go to meet someone in person if they have only communicated with them online, unless accompanied by you.

Encourage your child to talk about any threatening or upsetting messages he or she may receive. It’s worth learning some of the frequent acronyms used in online chat rooms. For example, ASL stands for ‘Age, Sex, Location’ and LMIRL means ‘Let’s meet in real life’.

Teenage kicks

As kids turn into teenagers they often need more space and privacy – and a more democratic discussion about their Internet activities behind that closed bedroom door. Enjoying the Internet should also come with a sense of responsibility, both on a personal and social level.

Just as it’s morally wrong for students to copy-paste material from the Internet instead of doing their own homework, parents also need to talk about issues like the illegal downloading of copyrighted music and films. In fact, downloading anything from the Internet without your permission, whether it’s programs, plug-ins or games, threatens your own privacy and the security of your computer. Viruses and spyware often spread through the hugely popular peer-to-peer networks where teens share digital content for free instead of buying it from the shops.

It’s also essential to discuss the use of credit cards with teens to avoid online financial disasters.

Online bullying and shock videos are other disturbing web trends on the rise. Posting cruel messages, embarrassing photographs and extreme content on the Internet has become a common pastime among some teenagers. There is a sense that ‘anything goes’ in the online world. Doing things for a laugh or a few minutes of fame on YouTube, young people are often not thinking about the privacy and legal consequences of their actions, which can be very serious. Once the damaging material is on the net, it’s not possible to stop it from spreading.

Parents need to work with schools and other authorities to counteract these trends. We need to make sure our kids don’t become perpetrators of online harassment and crime, and explain how to cope if they become targets of unpleasant attention on the web. We also need to explain how they should protect themselves and their family’s privacy online. Thirteen-year-olds posting sexually suggestive photographs on the web don’t have the emotional maturity to understand the longer-term effects this may have on their lives.

Important offline conversation

Today the Internet is everywhere. Installing security software on the home computer and tweaking the parental control settings is only part of the solution to the security issues facing children on the Internet. Policing and spying tactics may sometimes be necessary, but the crucial factor in keeping our children safe online is the quality of our offline conversation with them.

Establishing trust and reaching an agreement on safe Internet use requires two-way communication between parents and kids. To be credible and effective, parents need to get informed and have a plan of action for dealing with the Internet.

Courtesy of F-Secure